News Culture

Cry Into This R34 Nissan Skyline GT-R Tissue Box If You Can’t Afford the Real Thing

Can we call it a Cryline?
A blue Nissan Skyline GT-R model (R34) with a hatch in its roof to dispense tissues
Camshop.jp

In just a few days, the first batch of R34 Nissan Skyline GT-Rs will be legal to import to the United States. Of course, if you haven’t already bought one and stowed it in a warehouse overseas, you may be unable to get one if you aren’t swimming in cash. That’s most of us, so come join the crying party around the R34 GT-R tissue box. At least you can afford some kind of R34, right?

This tissue box is apparently an officially licensed piece of Nissan merch from Camshop.jp. It’s sold as a “wet tissue case,” so it’s more like a dock for wet wipes than anything. Live fast, wipe ass as they say. At least, that’s how I’ve heard it.

The Skyline features a visible intercooler, wheels that turn, and even a technically accurate underbody. That’s all the reason you need to push it around on the carpet making “vroom vroom” noises. (You’re an adult, nobody can tell you not to.) It’s available in three colors—black, silver, and blue—and weighs just over a pound, so it’s big enough to be worth displaying, but not so bulky that it costs too much to ship.

Speaking of shipping, Camshop.jp says it’ll sell these Skylines through broker service Buyee, meaning it should be available to U.S. customers. It’s listed at the equivalent of about $47 plus shipping, so it’s cheaper than a lot of RC cars are. Shipping may still cost about as much again, but even then, you’re in for less than the inevitably overpriced real GT-Rs will be. Or for that matter, the nearly half-million-dollar tributes based on the R35. And those don’t have wet wipe dispensers, do they now?

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