Come on Down to Mannequin Mountain for a Drive-Thru Body Part Heist
15 minutes. All the legs you can get in your car.
What springs to mind when you think "car heist"? Is it a Fast & Furious-style style snatch-and-grab of a bank vault in Rio? A fast getaway in a Subaru WRX with classic rock blasting through the stereo? How about you trying to stuff your call full of as many mannequin body parts as possible with a 15-minute time limit? The last one is oddly specific, and perhaps may haunt your thoughts for a long time. But if you want it to be real, I have massively great news for you.
British mannequin manufacturer Mannakin has a big pile of bits, and for just 50 quid (about $70 at the current exchange rate) you can buy yourself 15 minutes of drive-through grab-time in what they're selling as a "heist." As reported by the Daily Mirror and other outlets, businesswoman Roz Edwards has a giant stockpile of more than 20,000 mannequins used on shows like X Factor and Top Gear, and she needs help getting rid of her surplus. As one does, she decided to make a game of it.
Paying up and going to Lincolnshire allows you to grab as many body parts as you can fit in the trunk of an estate car (the back seats must not be down) and you can even bring a cordless drill to help you—here's the bit that might stick with you—let accumulated water out of the parts before you put them in your car.
What you absolutely, without question, cannot do is fill your trunk with hands. The Mannakin website is extremely clear on this: "We often get asked about hands. You are welcome to hands but there is a limit of 5 pairs per customer along with other parts. Under no circumstances whatsoever will you be able to fill your car boot with hands. Please don’t ask."
If you're after mannequins, then UK prices would put you north of £60 for a single pair of legs, so this is a heck of a deal if you can get away with a few torsos and your mandated limit of hands. A few scribbled calculations later, we reckon that you could be away with at least six sets of legs in the trunk of an E-Class.
But be careful, the mannequins are dangerous: It's easy to get overexcited as you gleefully hurl humanoid shapes into the back of your car but for goodness' sake, do not start an avalanche. Apparently, the mountainous stacks of mannequin parts are liable to subsidence, so drivers are instructed to keep their cars as far away from the pile as possible and pickers to take care.
If this sounds like your sort of road trip then, Mannakin is based near Grantham, UK, just off the A1. They describe the experience in some detail but do warn you that there are no toilets or refreshments available, to keep the heist atmosphere authentic. "Upon entry, you will be directed around what we used as the Mannakin Safari back in October. Until you get right round to the mountain, nothing is for sale, it is only the mountain that we are selling from.
"Do not get out of your vehicle until instructed when we will park you up in front of the mountain and then you can breathe a sigh of relief that your turn has come. Bring humor and have fun, please."
Got a very weird junk yard? Mail me on hazel@thedrive.com
