Please, Look at How the French Teach Their Teenagers

The tradition of scaring teenagers is a long and proud one. Without adequate terror, how else would kids learn life’s horrors and subsequently forgo reckless behaviors? Driver’s Ed is a litany of gruesome crash footage supplied by the California Highway Patrol, with intent to keep hedonistic teens from guzzling beer and seeing if pop’s Dodge Intrepid can do 100. Sex Ed is 1,000 pictures of highly disfigured genitals and one colored condom on a banana. Academic motivation is provided via colorful tales of Uncle Stan, who didn’t take AP Calc and thus became a one-armed carny with onion B.O.