The World’s Slowest Motorcycle Drag Race Is Also the Best
Real-Life Ricky Bobby. We’re guessing they didn’t kiss afterwards.


When the going gets tough, as the saying goes, the tough get going. So when two Australian motorcycle racers were simultaneously confronted with mechanical malfunctions, they did what any two true competitors would do: Made like Will Ferrell and took off for the finish line, on foot. And since they managed to bring their hobbled racing machines with them, it actually counted.
Maurice Allen and Ryan Learmonth were all set to blast their two-wheel dragsters down the strip at the Australian Professional Drag Racing Series' 400 Thunder. When the tree went green, however, both bike's engines decided it was time for a union break. Allen's sputtered and coughed its way 30 or 40 yards down the track; Learmonth's refused to even make an effort to head for the finish line.
Then spirit of Ricky Bobby began to flow. Instead of accepting his fate and hitting pit lane for a beer, Learmonth grabbed the metaphorical bull by the horns and the literal bike by the handlebars, and began hustling his ride down the track on leg power. Allen, spotting Learmonth coming up hot (or at least lukewarm) on his six, hopped off his own bike and started pushing, too, leading to what might be the slowest battle drag racing history . We won't spoil the ending, but let's just say that it follows two minutes and seven seconds of surprisingly intense low-speed drama.
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