As the warm weather has returned to our humble city, the New York Police Department has embarked on a quest to rid NYC's streets of dirt bikes and all-terrain vehicles, which are illegal within the city's limits. And because Mayor Bill de Blasio and police commissioner Bill Bratton apparently have the maturity of nine-year-olds, they've decided the best way to deal with the problem is not simply to confiscate any such vehicles the NYPD finds, but to smash them into teeny, tiny pieces. With a bulldozer.
Which is exactly what the NYPD did earlier today. And to add an extra layer of prickishness to this shepherd's pie of dickery, the department broadcast the entire affair live on Facebook, complete with a snotty caption.
Large packs of dirt bikers and ATV riders can often be found tearing ass through New York's streets, performing stunts, blocking traffic, and occasionally scaring the pants off doe-eyed Ohioans fresh off the bus in search of Broadway stardom (or maybe the M&Ms World store). The off-road vehicles' agility and speed makes it difficult for police officers to chase after the vehicles on foot or by patrol car, so in response, the NYPD has taken to chasing the groups down via helicopter. So far, the department has reportedly seized 671 of the vehicles—a 96 percent increase over last year's number.
Commissioner Bratton, for what it's worth, is merely making good on the crotchety promise he issued last month. "We intend to take all of these things and just crush them," he said, according to Gothamist. The riders, who the commissioner reportedly referred to as "nitwits" and "clowns," would not "be too happy when we take those damn [bikes] and crush them."
Bratton said he was inspired by his work smashing up drag racers' cars during his stint as police commissioner of Los Angeles. "It killed [those drivers] to see their cars out there in the desert," he said. "We'd lift them up with a crane 100 feet off the ground and drop them."
"So glad they are focusing all this time, money and effort on destroying taxpayers recreational vehicles instead of taking care of the infestation of crackheads on 8th ave," one commenter wrote.
Others pointed out the obvious stupidity of destroying dozens of perfectly good vehicles instead of auctioning them off.
"Can someone explain why they need to be destroyed? (Instead of being donated/given to charity in a state where they are legal.)" another commenter asked. Another user noted, "How about auctioning them off? Hmm more revenue for the city? Or maybe donate proceeds to city harvest?"
The Drive reached out to the NYPD for comment about the department's efforts to curtail the usage of off-road vehicles within the city, but was rebuffed by the department. "Unfortunately, we are unable to accommodate your request," the NYPD said via an unsigned email. We have requested further explanation, and are awaiting a response, though we don't have high hopes.
In summation: Real dick move, NYPD. Real dick move.