Driving a Pagani Huayra to Whole Foods Still Doesn’t Make You the Most Obnoxious Person There

That would be the fellow buying the asparagus water.
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How rich do you have to be to drive a $1.5 million Pagani Huayra to Whole Foods? Ludicrously.

America’s premier fancy-pants stores each has their nicknames. Neiman Marcus is “Needless Markup,” Starbucks is “FiveBucks” and Whole Foods is, of course, “Whole Paycheck.” But all that snark presumes a reasonable salary; for the millionaire class, dropping a couple thou on Parmigiana Reggiano and Manuka honey is no more a strain than picking up a couple of Slim Jims at the Mini-Mart.

Still, you know all the bulk items are getting delivered: the cases of Dom Perignon at 11, the cases of Ossetra at noon, the side of Wagyu in the evening. That’s why, if you have the means, you drive your carbon-fiber bodied, AMG V12-powered Italian hypercar to your local Whole Foods not for vittles, but for show. Give the people, the simpering upper-middle class and their Acura MDX’s, what they want.

Ben Keeshin is a former staff writer for Maxim, and before that, contributed writing to the digital sides of Road & Track and Vanity Fair.