5 Things We’d Do With This Ferrari F1 Engine at Sotheby’s

Sotheby’s has a legit Schumacher Era V-10 straight from the Scuderia. It could be put to service in a number of interesting—and terrifying—ways.

Cymon Taylor 2015 © RM Sothebys

Racecars trail only iPhone in the rate at which perfectly serviceable, even beautiful, equipment becomes obsolete. Take, for example, this wondrous piece of machinery up for auction from RM Sotheby’s without reserve: a legit Ferrari Formula 1 engine from the 1997 season. Forced into early retirement by environmental and performance regulations, engine No. 354 still has a lot of life in it. It’s a 730-horsepower, 40-valve, dry-sump, 75-degree V-10 that can rev to 18,000 rpm. And this lump is a historical one, too, originating from one of Ferrari’s most exciting years, the beginning of a what would become a decade of dominance.

While pieces this valuable usually end up as conversation pieces in a millionaire garages overlooking the Aegean Sea, we think it’s criminal to put such an instrument to task collecting dust. Here are 5 ways we’d use RM Sotheby’s used Ferrari F1 V-10.

The Ultimate Intramural Engine Swap
Ferrari, of course, is owned by Fiat. It’s a comical kind of hierarchy, the wee Punto hatchback making it possible for the mighty LaFerrari to exist. Why not bring those two poles together and shoehorn this F1 V-10 into a Fiat 500? Call it the Fiat 3000. Like Renault’s Clio V6 RS, that car would be mostly engine, incredibly fast and superlatively dangerous. Delizioso.

Cymon Taylor 2015 © RM Sothebys

The Ultimate Noise Machine
Anyone can purchase a high-feature clock radio from Brookstone and fall asleep to the sounds of fake ocean, or fake rain, or fake whales. Why not mount this Ferrari V-10 in the corner, hook up the appropriate fluids and exhaust, and fall asleep to the shrieks of horsepower as you feather the throttle from bed?

 

The Ultimate Insult
Car fans generally, and the Ferrari tifosi particularly, get precious about history. All of Maranello’s old Le Mans feuding makes for easy trolling. Idea: Piss everyone off by purchasing this pristine, prized racing engine, then donate to the Ford Museum in Dearborn, Michigan. Enzo’d roll over in his grave.

Cymon Taylor 2015 © RM Sothebys

The Ultimate Snowblower
Do not just displace the snow; annihilate it with the power of one thousand Mediterranean fire gods. It can’t be that hard to rig up the appropriate rig to the driveshaft, right? Fans? Screws? Whatever.

The Ultimate Mondial
The Ferrari Mondial is the world’s least favorite Ferrari. Slow, ugly, chunky, sad...but still mid-engined. Fill the rear quarters Ferrari’s worst car with its best engine. It’s an inside joke everyone can enjoy.

Cymon Taylor 2015 © RM Sothebys