Japanese Pizza Delivery Scooter Racing Is My New Favorite Motorsport

Forget Ferrari vs Red Bull, it's all about Pizza Hut vs Domino's.

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Are you a Japanese pizza shop owner looking to hire a driver who will deliver pies within your 30-minute guarantee all of the time, every time? Your search just got a lot easier. Let me introduce to you the gloriously hilarious world of Japanese pizza delivery scooter racing. And yes, it's exactly what it sounds like.

Much like certain parts of Italy—or Manhattan for that matter—Japan is a very densely populated place and therefore, pizza delivery is done on compact, versatile scooters. In this case, Honda Gyros are the generally accepted vehicle for the likes of Aoki's Pizza and company. According to Jalopnik, these 50cc scooters achieve 100 mpg and give owners a tax break—the ideal vehicle, then, for Japanese pizza delivery (Hey, if we can have New York-style sushi, they can have Japanese pizza.) They also have three wheels and tilt—the ideal vehicle, then, for hilarious Best Motoring-style circuit-deathmatches.

Better racing than many of IndyCar's poorer showings, no? The way the drivers lean knee-scrapingly low through the bends is just like MotoGP, no question. Formula 1's popularity may be making a comeback recently, but I'm convinced that might be cut short if the FIA ever decided to sanction and televise Japanese pizza delivery scooter races. If anything, it'll give Honda a motorsport to finally excel at.