Monday Mileage Champion: 2009 Chevy Suburban With 514,144 Miles 

This Suburban hit the mid-six digits on the odometer. Too bad it also has issues that would cost you the mid-five digits if you got them repaired at a Chevy dealership.

Steven Lang

Trucks and SUVs these days aren't cheap to keep.

Steven Lang

That late-model F150 which won't blow cold air through the center vents? It may take 13 hours of aarr-duous labor to get that blendor motor replaced.

Steven Lang

That same PITA labor times is pretty much the new norm for anything else that impersonates a truck or SUV these days, and this Suburban is no different.

Today we have rolling 5000-plus pounds of various metals that are diligently attached to dozens of sensors that will often dictate the long-term quality of that vehicle.

Steven Lang

Sometimes things just wear out. Other times it's the owner that turns that $70,000 mastodon into a rolling carcass. So what about this Suburban? 

Try to say all of this in one breath. 

Major Differential Defect, Major Engine Defect, Major Transmission Defect, Prior Taxi, Structural Damage, Title Branded - Taxi

Steven Lang

So what is this Suburban good for? Parts? A rotating pedestal at a museum for modern junkyards? You make the call!